My Daughter Thinks We Owe Her A Lifetime Subscription

I never thought I'd be writing this, but here I am, a 58-year-old woman from Ohio, wondering where my husband Tom and I went wrong.

Let me start from the beginning.

When Tom and I were young, we made a decision that raised quite a few eyebrows in our families. We decided to have only one child. Both our parents pushed back hard. "You need to try for a boy," my mother-in-law kept saying. "You're still young enough, and you're doing better than most folks." But we stood firm.

Here's the thing: we looked at our finances honestly. We could either give two kids a mediocre life or give one child everything. We chose the latter.

And boy, did we deliver. Our daughter Emma got dance lessons and soccer camp — not just the free activities at the community center. She spent summers at beach camps in Florida, not stuck at grandma's house across town watching TV. She wore new clothes, not hand-me-downs.

Starting in ninth grade, we paid for tutors. We covered her college tuition at a good state university. And when she graduated, we handed her the keys to a one-bedroom condo we'd bought, renovated, and furnished. A real launchpad into adult life.

I have a brother. Tom has a brother and a sister. We're the only ones who stopped at one kid — everyone else has two or three. And you can see the difference at every family gathering. Emma's cousins never dreamed of annual beach vacations. They wore each other's clothes and their parents' old stuff. Nobody was buying them apartments.

Emma saw all this growing up. I thought she was smart enough to connect the dots.

I was wrong.

After college, Emma worked for two years, then got married. We didn't object — she was an adult, and what good would objecting do anyway? They moved into her condo. Tom and I stayed out of their business. Let them work, live, figure things out.

Six months later, they announced a pregnancy.

I smiled and congratulated them, but inside, I was worried. Her husband Jake couldn't hold down a job. He'd bounce from one place to another, sometimes going two months without a paycheck — one month job-hunting, another month working before payday. But I kept my opinions to myself. They were adults.

Our grandson arrived, and everyone was thrilled. We brought gifts, helped furnish the nursery, bought all the newborn essentials. The young parents looked so happy.

Life moved on. Tom and I started saving for a little lake house. Retirement was approaching, summers in the city are brutal, and we wanted a place to relax after decades of hard work.

We'd visit Emma and the baby, or they'd come to us. They were living pretty tight. Jake's job-hopping didn't slow down after the baby came. I didn't like it, but Emma defended him: "He's looking for something better." Maybe so, but he picked a terrible time to experiment. Wait until your wife's back at work, then chase your dreams. Meanwhile, they kept asking us and Jake's parents for money just to get by.

Then, two years in, we learned Emma wasn't going back to work anytime soon. Baby number two was on the way.

I thought it was reckless. Two kids under three, Emma locked into another three years at home, Jake still bouncing around like he's in his twenties, and four people crammed into a one-bedroom condo. Those kids would outgrow that space fast.

Turns out, Emma had thought about the space problem too. She just wasn't planning to solve it herself.

She knew about our lake house fund. So she started dropping hints. "It's getting so cramped with the kids." "They grow so fast." "We really need at least a two-bedroom." "I'm not working, Jake doesn't make much."

Eventually, the hints stopped and she just said it straight: "Give us the money. I know you have it."

Tom and I tried to explain. We raised our child. We gave her everything. We still help when we can. But fully supporting her family? That's not our job. Her kids' well-being is her responsibility now. We did our part. Now we want the lake house we couldn't afford when we were busy giving her the good life.

Emma is furious with us. She says we're being selfish, thinking only of ourselves when "normal parents" would help their daughter and grandchildren.

We reminded her that we already helped. That condo they live in? We bought it for her. Without us, they'd have nothing.

But apparently, that's not enough. Apparently, we owe them support for the rest of our lives.

That's not what Tom and I signed up for. Parents take care of their children. We took care of ours. Now it's Emma's turn to take care of hers.

Nobody forced her to have those babies.